Local native launches support group for families

CELINA - Milt Howell is on a mission.

Howell, a Celina native and the father of two adopted sons, founded a support group in June for the local lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, queer and asexual community and its allies.

"I wanted to show the LGBTQA community that they had a space ... in this community," Howell said.

Family, Friends and Mentors of the Marginalized, or FFAMM-ILY, meets every Monday from 7-8 p.m. at Celina First Presbyterian Church to discuss LGBTQA issues. It is open to all ages and denominations. The group has 10-12 members but the numbers are growing, organizers said.

Howell, 64, moved back to Celina from Oregon in 2013. He felt compelled to return when news reached him of Celina High School students who were prevented from wearing shirts that referenced their homosexuality to school.

In 2012, two students wearing shirts bearing the word "lesbian" were asked to change. School administration said the shirts potentially threatened to disrupt the classroom while students argued controversial political shirts should be allowed. The conflict garnered national attention.

After reading about the incident, Howell felt the area needed a visible support system for the LGBTQA community.

"A few years ago, I felt a strong calling. I needed to come back to my hometown to support people in a gentle, non-confrontational way," Howell said.

FFAMM-ILY organizers believe an open dialogue will increase understanding of the LGBTQA community, a need group members air during their weekly discussions.

"We have people speak at the meetings about their difficult experiences coming out and we also have people there who reacted negatively at first when their loved one came out," co-chairperson Fiona Clancy said.

The Rev. Nan Clancy, Celina First Presbyterian Church's pastor and Fiona's mother, co-chairs the group along with her daughter and Howell. She said she felt a faith leader should help those who struggle to reconcile their faith with LGBTQA issues.

"I see a lot of people who are torn between a desire to be warm and loving and a desire to be faithful to the Bible," Nan Clancy said.

While she does not have family members or close friends who have acknowledged that they are LGBTQA, member Nancy Booher said she felt compelled to join the group.

"I just feel as though in this area we need to reach out and offer emotional support," she said.

Booher went on to say she works as an in-school suspension teacher at the Celina Middle School and sees students struggling with the issue. She felt FFAMM-ILY would help her better understand the conflicts students face.

Howell has personal experience with the struggle local individuals sometimes experience. The challenge he faced while coming out as gay was another motivation for founding FFAMM-ILY.

"Being judged un-Christian by the church of my youth, that I loved," Howell said, "it was a very difficult experience."

Howell hopes others will not have such a negative experience.

"All you need is to be tolerant," he said. "People who oppose have no idea of the pain their lack of acceptance creates."

Both Nan and Fiona Clancy credit Howell with starting the organization and admire his passion for equality and acceptance.

"He's one of those people who just brightens your day when you see him," Fiona Clancy said.

Nan Clancy agreed.

"He's a real blessing," she said.

Howell has a history of lending a hand to those in need. He worked for the Oregon Department of Corrections for 26 years as a library coordinator. The libraries Howell cultivated throughout the state provided inmates access to the courts through law book collections.

During his time with the department, Howell also wrote a program on self-parenting for inmates with absentee parents.

"It was about how to accept yourself, love yourself and discipline yourself," Howell said. "There were two steps to get into the program. First the inmates applied and then 12 at a time were selected."

He paused and smiled.

"All were chosen, you see, so they would know what that felt like."

The program graduated 3,000 inmates by Howell's estimation.

Howell, now retired, is the organist and pianist at the Celina Presbyterian church, although he is not a church member.

For more information or to join the group, call the church at 419-586-3304 or call 503-422-1166. They also have a Facebook group under the name "FFAMM-ILY."